You all have been so good to me! I wish I could write each of you a letter of how much you have encouraged and inspired me throughout this time. I hope that I will be able to soon! Words just aren't enough.

My mom is in pain now that she has started chemo. She doesn't feel like herself and isn't eating near enough(as expected). Please pray that she finds some foods that are appealing to her. Food is the key for life. Her attitude has been struggling because she has no energy and feels sick most of the time. It's really hard not to be by her side all the time!

I was supposed to see her this weekend, but got sick and didn't want to threaten her with getting sick, since her immune system is incredibly weak right now. I really hope to see her this coming weekend!

I feel like I am constantly playing catch-up in life. I have really messed up on finances, school is beating me up, I've been sick, I don't sleep enough, I'm eating like crap, I am not working-out, and those of you who know me really well can confess that obviously I have been thrown off my, "i am in control" pedestal. The best part of it all is that I LOVE IT. I actually know who I am right now. I don't feel like I have to answer to all the enemy's questions because I know I am not capable of being in control of anything!

I guess that sounds strange( I am sure some of you have been worried about me lately), but God is incredible and I'll never lose sight of that. I feel his love daily and he has given me blessings that are immeasurable. I have some really down moments, but he shows me everyday that something way bigger than me is coming out of all of this. Without suffering, you don't learn what life is really about. I don't wish suffering upon anyone, but I don't think I've ever dreamt so much. It's the first time I can say that I just really have let go of caring about what anyone thinks they know about me. A lot of people love me and a lot of people don't and that's ok! I'm just so thankful for those who do.

I love you all. Thank you for supporting me in letting go of those who do not. This is good.